I March, Head high, Chest Up, with the courage of a soldier
I March, Facing an enemy against all odds with a price in mind
I March, dodging bullets aimed to kill but only scratching
Creating wounds, today's pains, tomorrow's scars,
Memories of pains he turned to victories that i so easily forget sometimes but i march
Looking for the meaning of Life,
For love in all the wrong places
Stuck alone in my mind with battles and consequences
Facing Choices and Decisions of things I thought I had to do, but I march
Wondering how i could have done things differently
As the weight of my shoes get heavier and heavier
As I pick pieces of Unforgiveness and bitterness and worse of all
The fear of the Unknown, but I march
Wondering how I found myself in a place that I can barely recognize
When in my dreams I reach for the stars
And I am trying to bridge the Gap between when I am
and where I want to be with the question
Who am I, but I march
Looking at every Street name, looking for a way out
A way to, A path to who I really am
As I bump not into people but reflections of people
Bummed because a shadow can't show me the way out
and I have made to many wrong turns already, but i march
I march until I get to the fork in the road
and I am caught between taking a new path and walking back into my mess
And for the first time i think
I think of what it must mean to take this new salvation street
And the words Pop in my mind
That I am singled out as able to live victoriously as ordained by an invisible God
Finally a way out of this mess
Walking into Destiny, Creating History
I Think of a lowly Caterpillar
Building it's Cocoon to become a butterfly
And this thought brings a smile to my face
Cause i can't wait to Fly
And I am eager with a new anticipation of what it must mean
To leave from rubbing my Feet with the dust,
to finally Flapping my wings and saying what's up to the Birds
I spot and eagle and I think, One day I will be like Him
But no one ever told me about the pain in the process
No one ever told me that one by one crutches will be pulled away from me
Leaving me Helpless, needing Greater, Divine Attention
No one ever told me the truths I must find
Digging deep past layers of pain so indescribable
Yet so detectable in my inability to relate to you
As I glaze on Auto Pilot, Doing nothing as things get done
Criticizing the Status quo
Unable to see that which really needs Change, ME
Not till I walk past the mirrors of truth and I can finally see
That this Cocoon is a place where love can be born
A place where He wants to heal wounds that five stitches could not fix
Stapled so tightly to conceal the wound
Yet missing out on infections that came from lies of anonymous authors
Like Warriors Don't Cry.
As if to say that Tears are a sign of weakness
As if to Say that weakness is a sign of hope lost.
But a light is shed and I now Understand that His strength is made perfect in this weakness
And as I watch people drowning in seas that once almost Consumed
I can lend a hand, gain a muscle, become a platform for divine artistry
As He splatters colors all over me
Like the Rainbow He makes a Covenant with me
Affliction shall not repeat itself a second time
And Now I can see that every Blue thought on a yellow day,
He is turning into the beauty of a green Nature
And you wonder why I am so Fly when I finally, finally Finally Fly
It is not me, I am just a piece of artwork
Often Interpreted but never really understood
But one that's been signed and approved by the greatest artist of all times
Jehovah!!
Why this journey
There is a major factor we most often fail to consider when we make plans for the future, that factor my friends, is called Life.In my mind I picture it like the game Hide and Seek.You have a few minutes to find a spot, and Ready or not.. here it comes. Life unravels itself in the most random way sometimes, and regardless of how much we prepare for it, I am learning that there are certain things we will just never see coming.
As Human beings we are all vulnerable to the Whens, Whys, Hows and Wheres that the various circumstances we face throw at us. Sometimes it's just that tiny little piece of the puzzle we are searching for, and other times it's the uncertainty about where to begin.
So I began a journey,a search is to discover what it was in me that was constant. I wanted to know the thing that stands true even when hit with the greatest paradox in life,that immeasurable gap between my dreams and my reality.
This Blog is all about that journey. An attempt to hold unto one thing I am certain was the same the day I was born, and will stay true till I die.
Giving my Life to Jesus has released to me what I believe is the greatest treasure of all times. The best way I can describe it is as, is a Personal mirror of truth.I must admit that my reflection scares me most of the time, for the simple fact that it is perfect.I must admit that I have been bothered by the parallels of what I see and how I feel but slowly I see possibility of these paths merging. This Perfection, I have come to understand to be the way GOD sees me. It is independent of what I have said or not said, what I have done or have not done. It is that part of me that does not fluctuate.
I look deep into this mirror and though what I see must be true, it seems so hard to believe because it is contrary to what i know of myself.
I am hoping that through this journey , I can grow to share God's Perspective which is The reflection in the mirror.It is Clear now and I hope it becomes even clearer, I am just perfect for the Job He has for me.
I hope these reflections, prayers, poems and thoughts will strike a cord in you too and maybe we all can start looking past what Life says about us, to finding our own mirrors and admiring that perfect reflection in the Mirror.
